I was born in Jordan to a Palestinian Muslim family who adhered strongly to Islamic culture and religion. I came to the United States with my family when I was eight years old so they could make a bit of money and eventually return to Jordan.When we first came to the U.S. and saw the people on Baywatch, our family believed they were

Christian, so my dad wanted to make sure that his daughter did not grow up to be a Christian like Madonna.

When I reached high-school age, my father sent me back to Jordan to protect me from what he deemed typical teen activities—sex, drugs, rock and roll. So I returned to Jordan and soon became a devout Muslim, wearing a veil, praying five times a day, and attempting to imitate the prophet Muhammad.

After a few years I longed to return to Chicago, but my father gave me an ultimatum: I could come back but not attend an American school. I agreed and returned to live with my family.

At seventeen I was the prime age within Arab culture for girls to marry. Guys kept asking for my hand, and I kept refusing them. My father was concerned when I neared twenty-three and would be considered an old maid. So he took it on himself to send me back to Jordan so I could marry my first cousin.

My father was in Jordan preparing for the wedding, so my brother took my sixteen-year-old sister and me to the Chicago airport, intending for us to marry and remain in Jordan. Because of elevated security, only those with tickets could proceed to the gates. Our brother bid us farewell at security, but while waiting for our flight, both of us decided not to go. I felt that if I married my cousin, I would die every single day for the rest of my life. So I chose to run away instead.

But to avoid marrying my cousin by running away, I would disgrace my family. And do you know what happens when a woman disgraces her family in Arab culture? They kill her! But I figured a one-time death was better than a lifetime death, so I took my luggage and we went to the nearest hotel. When the plane landed sixteen hours later, my father and almost-husband stood waiting. Later my father called my brother, who began hunting for us to kill us.

I moved in with a friend. And concerned that I could be charged with kidnapping my sister, I sent her back home. She avoided my family’s wrath by blaming me.
Before long my brother discovered where my friend worked, and he appeared with a gun, threatening to murder both of us. He left when someone called the police. Then my friend came home and told me, “You know, Rockie, I’m not sure it’s safe for you to stay here with me anymore.”

I gathered my things and my friend drove me to a shelter for domestic-violence victims. As soon as I walked in a woman told me, “I was at Burger King today, and I’m not sure it’s safe for you to stay here because there was a guy there with your picture asking about you.” So at midnight they called a cab and sent me to another shelter. By then no one but God knew where I was. And because I was angry at God, I wanted nothing to do with Him.

A short time later while I was watching TV I heard someone say, “I’m not running away. I’m just joining the army.” I determined that’s what I would do—join the military for government protection. So I joined the Illinois National Guard and wrote in a letter to my family, “I’m a soldier of the United States Army, and if you try to hurt me in any way, shape, or form, that’s going to be considered a federal offense for you.” So they stopped looking for me.

After basic training I lived in hiding for more than four years, then decided I didn’t want to hide or live in fear the rest of my life. I contacted my mother and discovered that my father had stayed in Jordan and married a second wife. As a Muslim he can marry up to four women.

After I made peace with my mother and went to visit her, my father decided to visit the U.S. to see me, as well. Afraid, I insisted we meet in a public place. He agreed and didn’t try to harm me. But when my brother also requested a meeting with me, I truly feared for my life. Yet I remained safe from him as well. It was then I began to see God’s hand in my life.

I knew God only as Allah, and I tried to live as a devout Muslim doing good deeds and attempting to earn my way into heaven.

I took a job with a new company and was transferred to Dallas as a sales representative. Excited, I assumed I could travel to Mexico and do international sales. But God had completely different plans for me.

Not knowing a soul in Dallas, I moved into an apartment and began furnishing it. When the delivery man offered to assemble the furniture I had purchased, I panicked. I had invited a strange man into my apartment; I could be missing for days and no one would know the difference! Outside my apartment a woman was walking a dog. I explained the situation to her saying, “I just need you to come and help me while this guy assembles my furniture.” I must have sounded like a psycho, but she said, “Okay.”

This woman was sold out for Jesus Christ. So she asked me about my relationship with God and invited me to Bent Tree Bible Fellowship in Carrollton, Texas. I reasoned, “God created Islam and Judaism and Christianity, and He wouldn’t be too horribly upset if I went to a Christian church.”

I was surprised at the messages at Bent Tree. The pastor would talk about not lying, not stealing, not cheating, and I agreed with his views on all those things.The only thing I didn’t believe in was when he talked about Jesus. I knew he was confused because one week he would say that Jesus is God and the next week he would say Jesus is the Son of God.

But I kept attending. One Sunday the pastor spoke about missionaries who go into Muslim countries. That offended me. Another Sunday after he finished preaching, I went up to him even before he got off the platform and said, “I’m a Muslim, and I do know Jesus Christ.”

He said, “I know Muslims believe He’s a prophet, right?” And he built this common ground between us.

From there I indicated I would be willing to meet to discuss the Christian faith. After these discussions and after reading apologetic books by authors such as Josh McDowell, I was more confused than ever. I realized that both religions could not be right. One says one thing about Christ, and the other says a completely different thing. So I emailed the pastor, and he introduced me to several people. One of them was Dr. Dan Wallace, who unknown to me was a professor at Dallas Theological Seminary.

Dr. Wallace showed me how the Bible has been preserved over centuries. I soon realized that the Bible hadn’t been altered as I had previously believed. Next Dr. Wallace led me through Old Testament prophecies about the coming Messiah and pointed out how they had been fulfilled in the New Testament.

I came to believe that Jesus Christ is who He said, and was crucified and paid the penalty for humanity’s sins. The only thing left to sort out was whether Christ is God or the Son of God, and in Islam that is considered the most unforgivable sin you can commit. I figured the only one who could answer that question is Christ Himself, so I prayed to Jesus and said, “Hey, Mr. Messiah, prove to me that you are God by doing what I want you to do.” But Jesus never responded.

So my doubts crept back in, and I believed that maybe Jesus isn’t God or the Son of God. But in August of 1998, God sent an Iranian Christian pastor to me. He sat me down and asked me to share my years-long search. I said, “I’ve studied the Bible, and I believe the Bible hasn’t been changed. I believe that Jesus Christ died on the cross for humanity’s sins. I’ve studied the life of Muhammad and the life of Jesus, and I want someone like Jesus to be my father, my brother, my judge in the court of law, and the king of my country, because no one in history compares to Him.”

Then he said, “If you think He’s really that wonderful and that He died on the cross for your sins, will you at least confess that before God?” So I prayed and I accepted Christ as my Savior.

The pastor shook my hand and said, “I want to be the first to welcome you into the kingdom of God.”

I had no idea what he was talking about. It wasn’t until I sat in my car that I realized Christ was saying, “Just accept what you can accept about Me, and everything else will make sense to you.”

I soon enrolled at a Christian college in Dallas because I desired to understand the Bible even more. I continued my work as a full-time sales representative until my company changed hands. I then went to school full-time, but after I graduated with a bachelor’s degree God shut the doors on secular employment and opened the door at Dallas Seminary. And this May I graduated with my Th.M. degree.

What’s the next step on this amazing journey of a Muslim turned Christian? For ten years Jesus Christ has been my God, and He has been my King, and He has been my Savior. I am currently working for a ministry called Good News for the Crescent World, where I am the evangelism coordinator. I am passionate about reaching out to Muslims and reaching out to the lost, because I believe Satan has been defeated and he wants to take down many people with him. But I have been redeemed, and I want to take as many people with me as I possibly can.